WP: Hey, mom? In church, why do they call those things 'wafers' when they're really styrofoam?
KMS: (incapacitated from laughing, the kind of laughing that actually doesn't make any noise but causes your entire body to shake)
Colonel: (laughing) Those really are wafers, sweetie. Not styrofoam.
WP: Well, I'm just saying. Because one time I tasted one of those packing peanuts, and they tasted just like those things in church.
My laughter, by now audible, became convulsive. I thought Toby's head was going to hit the steering wheel.
I swear to God, you can't make this stuff up.
